on being proud

Having siblings can be a challenge. Being the older sibling can be so much more than that! A trial! A blessing! A horrendous responsibility! but most importantly an opportunity. The opportunity to equip your younger family members with much needed skills, values and experience they will need for life. I can’t say I enjoy(ed) every single moment of being the older sister. I am not going to neglect that it has ups and downs. Things forbidden for the older are granted much earlier to the younger. Tasks appear shared unequally. And babysitting the younger sibling can mean great fun but also a great mess to clean up afterwards.

However, I am most grateful for all my (step)siblings, but extremely proud of my two younger ones. My brother making is way into life did often had me in doubts and despair as I probably expected him to follow my lead more. I am glad he didn’t. I often felt helpless upon the way he was compared to me for various things. Grades, hobbies, responsibilities, behaviour and more. I am happy we developed in very different directions and cannot longer be compared in that way. Very recently he got married and I couldn’t have been more proud, emotional and overwhelmed by this event! He found someone he wants to spend the rest of his life with and I gained another sister and extended family I am honored to welcome into the family. They are great fun indeed! 🙂

Also, my little sister is finding her way into society. I never knew how much we influenced her in the early years. I was delighted to get the little sister I always wanted when my „original“ family was torn apart and patched back together. I honestly am lucky enough to gain so much more from something that could have destroyed so much. I am very proud of all my family for this achievement that makes all of us such a great unity! Anyway, she finished her apprenticeship with waving banners and is going to start studying soon. She is taking life in her own hands and starts building something that looks extremely promising as a future. And moreover, that seems to make her really happy, which is all I want for her. For them.

I am not sure if baby sisters/ brothers can understand this sentiment of pride in a way that we older ones can that we see their developments, struggles and success equally, with much more open eyes. Eyes wide with concern, hope and love. My siblings have taught me so much and I am sure equally have I. It is a strong bond that I wish will hold for the rest of our lives.There are plenty more reasons coming to be proud of them. But also to mock them like in the good old days. Both equally important.

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